What Actually Happens During a Wedding Ceremony?
And What You Could Totally Ditch!
A Modern Wedding Ceremony Rundown by Married by Maddi
When you picture your wedding ceremony, do you imagine a stiff, overly formal moment that you just want to get through so you can hit the dance floor? You are not alone. One of the biggest myths I love to bust as a marriage celebrant is that ceremonies have to be long, serious, or boring.
Spoiler alert: they do not.
As a modern, fun-loving Melbourne marriage celebrant, I’m here to tell you exactly what happens in a wedding ceremony and more importantly what you can totally ditch to make the moment truly yours.
What is the Typical Structure of a Wedding Ceremony?
Let’s start with a quick wedding ceremony rundown. While no two ceremonies are the same, most follow a general flow that looks something like this:
1. The Processional
This is the entrance the walk down the aisle. It could be dramatic and traditional or completely casual. You might walk in together, with a parent, or to your favourite Beyoncé song. It is up to you.
2. The Welcome
This is where I, your celebrant, welcome everyone and acknowledge the day. I might give a quick nod to the couple’s story, mention any special guests, or even include an Acknowledgement of Country if that’s meaningful to you.
3. Your Love Story
This is one of my favourite parts. I get to tell your story how you met, what makes you laugh, the quirks you love in each other, and why today is such a big deal. This section is always written uniquely for each couple and can be lighthearted, emotional, or a mix of both.
4. Readings or Rituals (Optional)
You might choose to include a poem, a cultural tradition, or a meaningful ritual like a handfasting or a wine blending ceremony. But you don’t have to. This part is totally optional.
5. The Legal Vows
This is the official bit. You’ll each say a short legal statement that makes your marriage legit in the eyes of the law. I’ll guide you through it so you don’t have to memorise a thing.
6. Personal Vows (Optional but Amazing)
This is your moment to speak from the heart. You can write your own vows, use humour, get sentimental, or keep it short and sweet. I help all my couples craft vows that feel natural and meaningful to them.
7. Ring Exchange
If you’re doing rings, this is where it happens. You can keep it simple or say something meaningful as you place the rings.
8. The Pronouncement and The Kiss
This is the official “you’re married” moment followed by cheers, applause, and usually a pretty fabulous kiss.
9. The Signing of the Register
This takes about five minutes. I’ll bring the paperwork, you bring the signatures (and two witnesses). It’s usually a great time for your photographer to get some lovely, candid snaps.
10. The Recessional
You walk back down the aisle together, officially married, as your guests celebrate. Big smiles, fist pumps, maybe a confetti toss—yes please.
What Can You Totally Ditch From Your Wedding Ceremony?
Here’s the best part: you do not have to include anything that doesn’t feel right for you. Your ceremony can be short and sweet, heartfelt and funny, spiritual, or simple. Here’s what many couples choose to skip:
Traditional readings: raditional readings are lovely if they resonate with you—but if not, feel free to choose something that feels more like your style (or skip them altogether!)
Being “given away”: There are no rules when it comes to walking down the aisle—go solo, walk in together, or bring someone special. Choose what feels meaningful to you..
Long-winded speeches: Ceremonies shine brightest when they’re heartfelt and engaging. If speeches are part of your plan, keep them short, sweet, and true to your vibe..
Formal rituals: Unless they’re meaningful to you, they’re not required.
Standard scripts: I don’t do them. Every ceremony is written just for you.
Remember: the only thing legally required is the legal vow wording, some paperwork, and an authorised celebrant (hi, that’s me). Everything else is yours to create.
So, What Should Your Ceremony Feel Like?
Honestly? It should feel like you. Whether that means laughing through your vows, including your dog in the ring delivery, or keeping it intimate with just your nearest and dearest, it is all about crafting a moment that feels real, relaxed, and totally your vibe.
Final Thoughts
Now that you know what happens in a wedding ceremony and what you can completely leave behind, I hope you feel empowered to make your day your own. Your ceremony sets the tone for the entire celebration. Let’s make it personal, full of heart, and something you’ll actually remember.
If you’re looking for a modern, fun, down to earth marriage celebrant in Melbourne, I’d love to chat. Whether you want an epic love story moment, a low key elopement, or something beautifully in between, I’ve got you covered.
💌 Get in touch here or come say hi on Instagram @marriedbymaddi
Let’s ditch the boring and celebrate the love.
— Maddi x
